Air Temperature: 4 Degrees Time: 7.20am
The Orange
‘The Orange’ My story came to mind today as I set of with barely any light. Walking along the river bank required more care with slippery rocks and wet tree roots surrounded by wet mud it was mountain goat day given the lack of light.
Life can be a bit like that at times, whereby you feel that you are walking in the dark. Picking your way through and around ‘obstacles’ that seem determined to trip you up.
In the dark what do we do?…grab a torch…get some light on the task…it all becomes so much easier!
Metaphorically it is no different in life…not really…pick up your torch called awareness…and shine some light on whatever it is that you feel is the stumbling block…and presto…it all seems a lot easier, more ‘doable.’
We have all got amazing faculties within our minds and a whole quantum field of information we can access to guide and support us. The only block to that, what keeps us in the dark, is our own disbelief. Disbelief that either it doesn’t exist, or perhaps even more frustratingly, a sense of knowing that this does exist but believing that for some reason or other we are unable to tap into it for ourselves.
Reminds me of the time Years ago – after I had channeled the work for KaiAmea and the tools for KaiAmea Therapy. At the time there was no one around me to validate what I was doing and I felt very much in the dark. For a moment – a few months actually – I allowed doubt to sneak in. It felt scary aspiring to pioneer something ‘new’ Doubt…led me to Sathya Sai Ba Ba who was alive at the time and living in Puttaparti. I took myself off to India and sat in his ashram for three weeks waiting for an audience with him…the chance to ask someone if what I was doing was the right thing.
For three weeks I sat there all day…often at the front of the courtyard…and every speech he gave to the thousands was in Hindu and that not being my native language, consciously at least, I didn’t understand a single word. As the three weeks came to an end I felt really despondent…
What you have to picture is an ashram crowded with thousands… to sit anywhere near the front of the courtyard where Sathya walked by was a miracle in itself. You had to start queuing at 4am in the morning to stand even a chance of being anywhere near the front…and Sathya would walk by twice…once in the morning and once in the afternoon…in between times he would give speeches (in Hindu) or there would be prayer, Bajjan, or silence for contemplation.
Two days before I was due to leave, after Bajjan, Sathya blessed a massive vat of oranges which he then handed out to the crowd. Yes there were a few hundred oranges, but the the numbers of the crowd were so vast…there were nowhere near ‘enough’ of those oranges for all.. I felt at the time they were more symbolic of the blessing, rather than being the literal blessing.
Anyway…I was near the front and the English group I knew where alongside me in a line. On the other side of me was a local girl from the village with a baby. These oranges were prized…blessed. An English lady got one and passed it down the line – I don’t know to this day why – but she did, and I found myself holding the orange in my hand. An orange. I looked at the girl next to me…her eyes wide and without even giving it a second thought I passed it to her smiling. Her whole face lit up in delight….I can still see how her aura lit up now…like magic…
Funny thing was, not one of the English ladies spoke to me after that. They snubbed me completely. Totally confused by this, on the last day during the line up to enter the ashram, I asked the lady in front of me what was wrong. To which she replied, ’everyone thinks that you are selfish because you didn’t share that orange but ate it all yourself!’
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
But the words came out, ’that’s absurd…I gave it to the girl with the baby. I can go to the market any day I like and buy a whole bag of oranges if I choose. As can all of you. They are all blessed, they are all a ‘gift’ from nature…’
Needless to say she didn’t appreciate or appear to acknowledge my defense…her choice… but what made my heart sing was that day… that last day, I found myself seated again at the front of the ashram and when Sathya Sai entered he walked straight over to me. It was as if he had witnessed the entire chain of events…He stopped and stood in front of me and with an intense look said in English…
‘You have everything you need…Go Home.’
You have everything you need… we all do…we all have everything we need right now…
Every single one of us is connected to the Quantum flow of abundance and possibilities. We are not ‘separate’ You do not have to ‘become’ anything to be aware of this energy flow within your life…you are breathing…you are already connected! What you do have to do however feels more counter-intuitive at first…you have to prepared to ‘let go’ Let go of the self doubts, feeling of lack of worth, of not being enough, clever enough, of there being something wrong with you…
It really is the case…let go…and find yourself ‘connected’…back home within yourself and within the flow …
What will you do to let go today?
Namaste
Enjoy your journey X