Air temperature: 6 degrees | Time: 7.30am
Don’t dim your light
What is it with people and gossip? It can be a challenge to be mindful when you are in a group of people and you feel the loaded comments. Even if you have a tendency to be mindful of speech, careful not to give the wrong impression and to speak with kindness and awareness of another and how they may be feeling… you can still find yourself on the receiving end of other people’s catty and hurtful responses, spiteful gossip and general meanness… It is I feel a misconception to hold the notion that if you act with integrity others will naturally treat you in the same way.
After all if that is not a natural behaviour for them…why would they? It is almost wrong to project onto them an expectation that they would. In just the same way that is it wrong to project an expectation that they wouldn’t! Bit of a minefield for an empath…not to feel the hurt and attach to the hurt… and also for the familiar pattern of adapting the behaviour of ‘make the other person ‘happy” not to be triggered. In situations of such dynamics empaths and sensitive persons can resort to dumbing down. Hiding themselves in self restriction and putting themselves down verbally or within their actions in order to make the other person feel better, perhaps making them seem more significant, important , cleverer or whatever in effect locking down.. For years I did exactly this…hiding in effect, pulling layer on layer on my ‘self’ layers which later on in life I had to peel away…not without personal discomfort and ‘pain’ Brain having been programmed with this defunct pattern had taken it on as a subconscious program and as such ‘reprogramming’ brought up a lot of resistance… in effect old emotional pain resurfacing triggering a flight or fight response and brain screeching, ‘this can’t be good for you…look how it hurts!’
Good it was though never the less… it takes courage and patience to change but it is worth it…the feeling of lightness and transparency – liberating. It is true that it doesn’t change other people…they may well still display their old projections…they don’t and won’t change behaviours until they want to, until they feel the need or something triggers their awareness to do so…but you know what? YOU aren’t affected in the same way or to the same extent anymore. You may well feel the hurt of loaded comments from others but these become indications of what you do and do not need and choose to do, rather that weapons that hurt your core.
What is more you don’t feel the need to dumb down anymore. Dumbing down to appease sucks and makes your life restricted and miserable. If others don’t ‘like’ and accept you, as you stand tall in all your feminine power then more fool them. They could offer unconditional friendship and walk along life’s path in harmony with you… but if they would rather cling to the shadow and be mean that is up to them. ‘
Don’t dim your light…just because it is shining in someone else’s eyes’
Perhaps this should be our new motto…and one that we pass on to our children?
Enjoy your journey X